shinjo toshiro

j'ai fait ce dessin après j'ai visité la tombe de tokugawa. c'était en sommet d'une montagne. tu pouvais y voir l'océan pacifique. il y avait des campagnes frais au-dessus. at the shrine i remember picking out strands of paper tied to a tree containing my fortunes. it was a silly notion that a tree which i have not seen nor heard of would contain my future. i also thought it was endearing to see old practices still remain.

shinjo toshiro is a kabuki actor by profession (a shugenja in life). he plays different funny characters at the grand kabuki theater at ryoko owari. it is a public secret that he is having relations with a prominent geisha. akikawa kobayashi. akikawa is a true geisha, an artisan. although she isnt (yet) formally been accepted to the tayu (the highest class of courtesan). she is also under an important contract with a crane noble. a relationship outside of this contract is discouraged.

akikawa is a member of the many displaced families of samurais who were killed in the past clan wars. to survive, akikawa became a geisha. this is probably good on a larger scale as many women of education have decided to join the ranks of geishahood, strenthening the culture, the high class reputation and the arts of the industry. which also indicates the rise of economic and politcal power.

toshiro is odd even for a unicorn. when not on the stage, he is a recluse. he prefers the company of sake rather than other people (even of those very close to him). he spends a lot of time making intricate calligraphy and wild poetry (just for his enjoyment). all his works however are stacked up gathering dust in his house. he lives at the edge of the city, near the kitayamas. on certain occasions, toshiro would be seen in public carrying a bouquet of lilies in the direction of "the floating world" (as otherwise known, the quartered pleasure center where all legal courtesans live). but these are rare and far to in between, spies working for the noble are always about. eventually, it will become too dangerous for akikawa to even talk to toshiro, and this is where our story begins ..

DEATH PENALTY

j'ai vu la discussion (the debate yesterday) la nuit passée à la télévision. i also watched "maalaala mo kaya" episode about the life of deli ataya tayan. it seemed to focus too much on what was sad about her life. when it is more likely that her life experiences are not dissimilar from our own. we all experience loss at one time or another. what was entertaining about it was the period costumes worn by maniyln reynes. the young deli.

[for] prevents re-commission of crimes, justice is served (not revenge), islam advocates the death penalty, biblical quote tooth for a tooth, works in malaysia, saudi arabia, emotional outbursts from crowd
realistic. proposing a selective execution. all death row convicts are on hold. example: drug lords do deserve capital punishment. who will shoulder the burden of maintaining life sentences.

[against] respect to the dignity of a human being, respect for human rights, death penalty is not a deterrent of crime. lessons learned from older civilizations (in europe), ineffective judiciary. does not insure a fair trial for the poor who cant afford a good lawyer, ineffective police and other peacekeepers.
argues that the certainty of capture is the deterrent. not death penalty. its barbaric. do we want to live in a society of barbarism.

[early game tactic] tips on playing the c3c: senggoku conquest. i played ueshegi. the first thing that i did was get rid of the two adjacent opponents using a rush of ashigoru units and the daimyo. this would give you needed space to expand and impale rival opponents from growing. when an invasion is hampered with bad luck or a stronger defence, i switch to seige mode and just pillage the improvements. this would further hamper the rival cities growth. until it can no longer support its military and its infrastructure or maybe even its populace. the peasant worker is key to getting roads built to the necessary resource.

[middle game tactic] by now, you would have expanded your regions in place of the fallen rivals and would have met other provinces. all you need to get rid of an entire province is kill the daimyo. it is not as simple as it sounds. first you have to know where he is, second you need to go against a formidable defence (usually). i build barracks in each capable city. if the number of turns is high for a city to build barracks i switch to either temple or a peasant worker. the barracks will ensure you veteran units. in science, i put it on above average on the edge of almost not earning any income. science i think is the key to surviving this stage. trading science and other goods are also helpful but if you set the aggressive level of rival provinces to "more aggressive", like i did, i dont see how this is possible. continue building and upgrading. the daimyo upgrade is very useful. i use the daimyo in almost all invasions. after a successful liberation of a city, and i feel like my armies are too spread out. i send out diplomatic quests to the rival province, asking them for a treaty of peace. at least until i have recovered the war efforts.

[end game tactic] use ninjas. they can "assassinate" an enemy in a city. they have automatic invisibility, normally, nobody can see them. clue: you may "assasinate" the daimyo. unfortunately monks are almost always hanging around a city. apparently monks doesnt classify as normal human beings and are able to see thru illusions. en plus (also) monks are available very early in the game. i do use ninjas to capture unsuspecting peasant workers or pillage enemy improvemtents without fear of formal retaliation because ninjas dont carry their passports. ultimately having a strong offense is not enough in this game. because with specialty units like the ninja. they can turn the tides of war.

[things that i dont like about it] the jesuit cathedral. although it is historical that the portuguese introduced feudal japan into xtianity. i didnt like being forced to building a cathedral just to pump happiness into a city. i wish they included parts of china and korea in the game. there werent any women units. nor were there any tributes to a number of great women in japanese history. there was a geisha house .. but they didnt came out of the house to play. which sucks.

SODA CANS

i got the habit of collecting soda cans and then placing them in line on my desk from adam. i would get one each week or two to mark it. to remind me of the amount of time spent working for lexmark ... like a prisoner doing time at the penitentiary, he would mark a digit for each day (with chalk) on the wall until it runs out of space. a couple of americans came in today and i was asked to get rid of my soda cans because they make my desk appear messy. i dont think the americans would mind seeing soda cans all piled up like that and not surprising i got the memo from a pinoy. i dont think anybody gets it. liberté. and probably this is what i have real proiblem dealing with. people not getting it.

inspite of repeated discouragement from some people who have been here longer. they are consistent. why do something when what we have been doing works. "why fix something when it aint broke" im not one to agree just because everybody does. and so i got the idea last week of automating the rebadge process. i think i am done with the engine. much of the project involved setting up the data for the engine. i can think of a few things i can add up to it so it will be truly universal. im going for functional at this point. i was very excited at the start but i think my enthusiasm has worn out because i dont feel like thinking today. hopefully later.

the circle is in a real mess these days. although this does not come to me as a surprise since i was at one point sick of talking about RPG myself. my disposition changed when clints group reintroduced me to it. his group has been in existence a lot longer. and it gave me hope that some day, the circle will be like that. still playing. still making regular visits to arcadia. probably the precise distraction i needed to deal with serious matters about having to come back (again) for good this time. or feeling lonely. or some shit. RPG was always there to help. everyone in the circle is busy with his or her shit. we dont have time anymore. i remember a point when we used to make time. (even skip classes hehehe) now its totally different. i wonder whats happened. i hope the other guys can see thru all of it. and do something.

world war 2. C3C. im playing the americans along with the commonwealth and the chinese against the imperial forces of japan. there is map of the philippines in which manila, davao, and puerto princessa were indicated (nice little cities hee hee hee). other cities of other south east asian countries were also there.

J'AI RÊVÉ

we were in a jungle. there was a river. the plants were bright green (this i remember vividly. the shoreline was partly submerged under the river water. the water was milky white. a boy (or was it a monkey) was playing with a spider. i called out to him to stop playing around. there were four of us playing. to my left, i heard someone say that the river tasted wierd. i look at the river water and it looked like canal water. the voice was me. but it wasnt me since i heard it from someone else. i was looking at the poor spider being tossed with a stick. the boy who i now think was a friend (a young friend or my brother).

then from the west, outcomes a shadow under water. it was swimming headed our way. it had a shape of an alligator. we sprang out of the water. we climbed up a wall that was behind me. only it wasnt a wall. it was a building. like a colliseum or an old college building. the window frames werent familiar. they were shine polished brown with 6 rectangular openings in the middle where clear glass go. the wood used were the ones they use for parquet floors. it looked european.

the shadow creature came out of the water. it was not an alligator. a kind of lizard i dont know the name of. (or it could be an amphibian from the way its skin looked - wet blue green pinkish and leathery). it had a very huge head and an even larger mouth. it did walk like a lizard with its legs pointing outwards from its body. it wobbled when it walked. did i mention it had a a huge gaping mouth? it was oddly funny and terrifying at the same time. it was always in the act of opening its mouth .. like it was yawning or about to swallow something thats bigger than itself. it had a sinister grimace on it, like it was up to something .. bad. really bad.

by this time all four of us have made it to several floors above ground using the solid protrusions made by the windows. i got separated from my friends when i took a stand on top of a wall. (a wall which wasnt part of the circular building but was attached to it. this wall was pointing to the river). and it was shakey. i tried a little balancing act but the creature has started to climb. i was sure that wasnt the safest place to be. so i went for the windows.

i can sense from my friends that this creature was serious business. i was curious. i think i heard my friends shout to hurry up. i cant see them anymore. theyve gone to the other side of the building, the part which i can not see from where i am at. (to which i deduced that the building was circular or at the least curved). awkwardly managing one window to the next. the creature was still making its way up. it seemed natural at that time that a lizard or amphibian of that size should be able to carry itself up. this one did anyway. still gaping. big mouth. its terrifying.

there is no getting away from it. it was six floor down. even though ive made my way. it was still climbing beneath me like i didnt move at all. ive decided to change plans. i opened the windows intending to climb inside. i think panic has already gripped me because i didnt go in. instead i continued to climb sideways. when four floors down, the last i saw of it was its tail. it climbed in one of the opened windows. i can only imagine of the horrors that will meet the residents of that room ...

PEUT-ÊTRE IL EST FRANÇOIS?

there was a debate last night at channel sept. MareAtPare (She Said He Said). the question was wether the attempt of some people about FPJs origins was politically motivated or is just an execution of the law. the constitution states that the president should be a "natural born citizen".

[execution of the law]

listening to the arguments. there are still a few of us who are willing to take on the mob and the trapos. if not for the country, but for knowing it is the right thing to do. it gives me hope. FPJ submitted to the Comelec two documents. his birth certificate and the marraige contract of his parents. the challenge. the indicated date on the the birth certificate is years early than the date indicated on the marraige contract. this suggests he is illigitimate. legitimate children follow the citizenship of the father. and illigitimate children follow the citizenship of the mother. (this is sexist and impartial to illegitimate children, but thats another story) and in FPJs case, le mere est une americaine. hehehe. now it will be the courts job to decide on the matter. (plus finding out which documents are authentic or which are faked)

[politically motivated]

kit tatad is a sad sad man. he was questioning fornier, mocking the lawyers arguments about the existence of the woman signed in the marriage certificate. fornier rebutted wittingly with "have you met lapulapu?" to which tadtad was too dumbstruck to respond. that confused look on him was just grand!! towards the end, he dug himself further resorting to name calling. conceited daw si fornier. hahaha. pathetic isnt it ..

imee marcos had nothing to say except heckle the mob to a frenzy. she went on with expertise enticing the mob to cheer .. she was not participating in the debate. that much is certain. which was noted by fornier (which i am very happy about). the scary part. you would think the progenies of one of the countrys most brilliant minds would have inherited part of that brilliance. no arguments came out of this woman who represents a district of the north. either that or she is what people perceive her and her family to be. scheming weasels. either way .. if this is the kind of politicians voted on by the mob then the mob deserves no more or no less better.

clearly the challenges are politically movticated and are but a technicality. but vying for the most important position in the nation calls for us to uphold even something that is above technicalities even above our own principles. this is the constitution.

... "one doesnt have to be of the people to be for the people."

[UML]

on a lighter note (hahaha lighter?) about UML. it was evident that he didnt know what he was talking about. he has read articles pertaining to it. he knows what it looks like. but i think the understanding does not extend to its purpose. it came across as he believes UML will magically put away all problems faced by developers. hehehe. i wish.

JOUR OCCUPÉ

j'étais occupé aujourd'hui au travail. finally after a month and a half of sitting around all day. i got my machine all setup for development. why didnt i thought of using my old scripts is beyond me. i was overwhelmed by the amount of work i need to do. i was scared of the amount of stuff that i have yet to learn. i was hoping that a would come all the way down here and then take me back to the nexus .. get married and live happily ever after .. whatever it is .. with this all setup, theres no stopping me now .. ^_^

i recorded my voice message at work. now it says "salut .. c'est moi max .. mais je ne suis pas .. please leave your name number and message .. ill try to get back to you as soon as i can" i consciously had to relax my mouth so that it wouldnt sound awkward. vous savez ... comment quelquefois les peuple .. would try too much to say something and it comes out .. un peu bizarre.

hoarding. human nature or pinoy culture? tout le matin .. i'd get upset over the empty coffee dispenser. because some people would hoard the sugar and cream way ahead of time. thinking of only of themselves. we let people get away with it just because its not urgent (nobody really gets hurt, or gets killed). or is there .. what about fairness .. what about rule of law. some people would argue that you either make it your way (means take the law into your own hands) or suffer. not the kind of society or culture i want to be part of. no. i refuse to believe that its nature ..

after ive played a short while in the past the game masquerade (its about the kindred and its ilk species) i grown very close to the concept. and recently this link has i have found out, revived in me this closeness .. to the kindred race .. consumed by fire .. c'est la vie .. c'est trés triste .. which myhtical creature are you .. I am Form 9, Vampire: The Undying. "And The Vampire was all that remained on the blood drowned creation. She attempted to regrow life from the dead. But as she was about to give the breath of life, she was consumed in the flame of "fire" and the cycle began again." Some examples of the Vampire Form are Hades (Greek) and Isis (Egyptian). The Vampire is associated with the concept of death, the number 9, and the element of fire. Her sign is the eclipsed moon. As a member of Form 9, you are a very realistic individual. You may be a little idealistic, but you are very grounded and down to earth. You realize that not everything lasts, but you savor every minute of the good times. While you may sometimes find yourself lonely, you have strong ties with people that will never be broken. Vampires are the best friends to have because they are sensible.

i think this song is about someone telling another friend to just deal with it or it could be that voice inside your head that helps us from being too upset. socrates called it divine voice. les catholiques called it angels. i call it alternate personality.

LES PIRATES

we got over talking about the elections at work. i felt more open about the elections or it could be just that i dont feel strongly about it. GMA and Rocco seem to be the better choices. i wish they had joined forces. so the middle class or the "enlightened" would not have to split their votes. i favor GMAs practicality and Roccos intellect (he reminds me of what plato described about philosopher kings running a utopia). an initial difference between them (i heard) is that GMA is pro parliament and Rocco isnt. je ne sais pas .. the impact of a parliamentary system in pinoy culture. if the english got out of feudalism (which i think somewhat parallels the contemporary state of the country), we should be able to as well .. all we need is a kind of rennaissance.

FPJ is like the fairy tale of camelot. an image of king arthur and his court. and the masa being peasants who dont know any better.

colon. i found the area where pirated stuff were being sold. it was an accident since i went there for another reason. to buy things for the apartment. it felt like tondo or quiapo on a good day. it was crowded messy but i didnt feel any less safe. as usual the sun was out et il fait tres chaud. i had to squint all the way from the brightness.

i ripped my 60s CDs. now i can listen to them at work without having to bring the CDs with me. yey.

PIT SENYOR "FAITH LORD"

c'était la meilleure et plus grande célébration de la ville de Cebu. alluring native colorful costumes were worn by all participating groups from the districts of the city. while the others prowled the sidewalks. i was impressed by how it was organized. the parade went around a premeditated rout and so traffic was rerouted. it reminded my of the revolving floor at baggage claim or the revolving table at a japanese resto where food were displayed round and about. i walked from the capitol to urgello to ayala. the parade ended at the sports complex where each competed with each other at different constests. my feet were hurting when i got back to the apartment. i slept good (in a long time).

the whole celebration is good in a way that it demonstrates unity and patriotism, and is bad in a way that it encourages supersition and the cult belief system. i have no problems with people having a devotion to the sto nino. however i have reservations with having innocent children dance and walk their way around the city beneath the scorching heat of the sun. i enjoyed the good part of it. i rather not think about the negative.

surprise encounter with ate ethel on my way out to dinner last night.

i saw two angels at osmena.

quick note about INC and its members. i believe they fail to see the nationalistic and cultural value of the fiesta. they didnt celebrate with the rest of cebu, depuis, ils ne croient pas le seigneur comme les catholiques. they cant see passed their differences. je croire.

superstition. i put a mirror across my bed (its more of a blanket) behind the door to induce dreaming. before i went to sleep, i thought about a. and i did dream about someone i dont know who. and several hours had passed before writing it down. ive forgotten what it was about. im going to try again tomorrow and this time ill have my pen and paper ready.

BABYLON 5 (S3) part 2

the three core races had different ideas about the universe ..

menbari - the universe is a living being. we are the universe made manifest in trying to understand itself. each being is a piece of this universe. when the individual understands herself, the universe understands itself. the society is separated into three castes. the religious, the warrior, and the laborer castes. much like what plato had in mind when he described the perfect society except there is no philosopher king governing the menbari.

narns - g'quan. a warrior with interesting insights on Les Ombres. maybe like a warrior buddha. who has gained enlightenment thru the warrior discipline.

centauri - no mention of religion or philosophy amongst the centauri. a practical proud and ambitious species. on the dark side, it is wrought with political maneuverings.

earth - christianity and the other major religions of the world all made their way across the system well into b5. and then there were us .. in short the b5 future is just like its predecessors .. a culture of unchanged principles (situations). the same problems plague humans. now thats depressing.

BABYLON 5 (S3)

the plot thickens in season 3. civil war has torn the earth alliance apart. le president de terre had declared martial law (a violation of the earth alliance constitution) in sight of a perceived threat to global security. the colony of mars leads the resistance. the city-station of babylon cinq declares its independence. other colonies are wary. le president de terre even goes as far as assaulting resisting states (the battle scenes are top notch). i esp liked it when the menbari arrived and declared b5 under its protection. humans against humans. friends against friends. the centauri space is also experiencing difficulties in its ambition for conquest. the narns are defeated long prior. looks like the work of the Shadows is almost complete. its likely apres le guerre - there wont be enough surviving machinery left to mount a substantial opposition if and when the Shadows (Les OMBRES) agenda culminates. this is sci fi stuff.

btw .. mr chekov is part of B5. haha. he leads the psi-corp much like the tal shiar of the romulans, as earths internal and external intelligence agency. and two characters were from animal house the movie are there too. vir, londos assistant and the major of alexander (c'est vailleusse).

starwars vs startrek. a core difference in premise and philosphy. while star wars presents a simple dualism to the universe (black-white hot-cold good-evil), star trek heads off on a more realistic utopia of how the way things could be for mankind. while the corrupt republic is corrupt because of the dark sides influencee (an intrinsic evil?), on the other hand star trek lets mankind carry its own responsiblities (the system is corrupt because of the people working in it are). that the universe is not a duality but rather a spectrum of idealogies. albeit it is fiction but it is science fiction.

Arachnoleptic Fit

frodo had an arachnoleptic fit (to use one of sunshine's new word) after being caught in sheobs web. i was able to watch LOR vendredi noir. it didnt seem as desperate as the last one, so i thought it wasnt as good either. i did like how subtle (yet powerful) gandalf rode to save the horsemen of gondor from massacre of the flying eels. en plus, i like eowyns courage (the warrior maiden of rohan). the army of ghosts was shabby (pour moi). and whats up with that crazy king person?

my first weekend at the new apartment. with no money left. a miscalculation. it has always been my problem - to keep serious watch on the budget. until the next tide ^_^ and even then all of it will be used to pay off outstanding debts (sigh). the third world ..

the universe must really hate me. there is going to be a sci-fi convention in makati this weekend. JUST great. i am not going make it (see reason above paragraph). n'import comment, c'est week-end prochaine is sinulog week. pit senyor.

SINUGBAYANIHAN. its a long line of ihaw ihaw (grilling). i wonder if mikes is here. or next week for that matter. i didnt bring a camera (nor can i afford another one atm). there were many people in the streets wearing native costumes. running to away an all sides. i heard drums in every corner outdoing each other. i had fun listening and watching it. this is a prelude to next weeks SINULOG - a celebration of cebuano culture. we dont have this kind of cultural pride back in manille. i wonder what happened. (politicians had pocketed the money?)

i bought a small tv to keep me company at the apartment. yong and ian are always out (not surprisingly theyve been here longer). i still keep thinking about a. which shows im not over it. not much to do about it except moan and let it pass. to most people, c'est tres triste, n'est ce pas .. quelque fois i cant help myself). im getting the hang of riding the jeepneys going to different key places in cebu. the system is organized. ive also been eating out at the carenderias (small eateries), trying out the local cuisine. so far im enjoying it. they have this peculiar preparation for rice that reminds me of japanese onigiri. its called puso^.

LES GRANDS PHILOSOPHES

c'est lundi matin. je suis au bureau a 7h00. im still high on sophies world.

naturalists
1. aristophanes
2. democritus

rationalists
1. socrates
2. plato
3. aristotle

the dark ages
1. saint agustin
2. saint thomas aquinas

rennaissance
1. galileo
2. copernicus
3. martin luther
4. newton

2004 RESOLUTIONS

i have three major projects for this year.

1. masters (usc)
2. french
3. sta ana (10 months to go)

im reading sophies world. i just finished plato's parable of the cave and aristotle. before them there were several materialists and then there was socrates who made a lasting impression on me when he discussed about the three types of people. the indifferent, the sophists, and the philosopher. what does that make me when walking a tight rope in between apathy and wonder? the last year i noticed a dive in motivation from me and my friends, i hope to see an improvement this year. i think sophie is helping me get back on the saddle. i will make up a list of philosophers and what they said in gist. just so i wont forget about them. im now in the middle ages, and several saints are christianizing the great philosiphies.

i found my dust covered thesis book. i have not opened it for almost a decade now. i started reading the first few chapters intending to remember what we did so i can use it for my masters. there is a lot of matrix translations and computations in it. most if not all of which, no longer makes sense to me. i thought about needing to ask people who are still versed in matrices to explain it to me. i was also amused at the obsolete naming conventions we used because some of my current contemporaries (who are claimed amateurs at programming) had similar standards. and further validated my suspicions about the big gap between a average C and an object oriented mindset. they are totally different.

pour le deuxieme fois, j'ai vu une film avec mes amis de l'universite. bridal shower is a very simple fairy tale about three women (francine, dina, and cherrie) and their relationships with men. the movie starts with francine and dina being successful and cherrie being the pathetic overweight internet maiden loser. and then the movie ends, with cherrie having true love with a stripper. and the other two being trapped (by choice), dina in an illusion, and francine in a very pretty cage. i think the moral of the story was we can not pass judgement since eventually we will all, make imperfect choices due to circumstance and can be entirely happy with it. rico also had a curious metaphor on the constant vomiting of our heroines towards the poor comic relief.