a small crowd sitted themselves in front and towards the side of the capitol (the seat of the provincial government) where the inauguration is held. we had little choice but take the backstreet. i meant to take pictures of the cannons which i saw on the way out. vehicles were lined up on the south side, picking up the dignitaries. in one of the cars was, mrs. cory aquino. she was warmly waving and smiling back at us. it was like standing a few inches from the pope. i was dumbstruck. she looked pretty, elegant as expected, warm and motherly. nora aunor was in a few vehicles further down. she seemed trying too hard to get noticed with her car windows rolled down. who do i find walking right beside us? it was mrs. miriam santiago. people crowded around her preventing me to get a good shot. i think she has a great and noncomforming mind. and few of the mediocirty can appreciate it. this is the first time that im able to personally see any of the politicians, and an ex-president. it was fun.
mercredi, juin 30
l'inauguration présidentielle
a small crowd sitted themselves in front and towards the side of the capitol (the seat of the provincial government) where the inauguration is held. we had little choice but take the backstreet. i meant to take pictures of the cannons which i saw on the way out. vehicles were lined up on the south side, picking up the dignitaries. in one of the cars was, mrs. cory aquino. she was warmly waving and smiling back at us. it was like standing a few inches from the pope. i was dumbstruck. she looked pretty, elegant as expected, warm and motherly. nora aunor was in a few vehicles further down. she seemed trying too hard to get noticed with her car windows rolled down. who do i find walking right beside us? it was mrs. miriam santiago. people crowded around her preventing me to get a good shot. i think she has a great and noncomforming mind. and few of the mediocirty can appreciate it. this is the first time that im able to personally see any of the politicians, and an ex-president. it was fun.
lundi, juin 28
le geneologie
après un semaine, i finally solved my VendorSetup problem. i have been working on it for more than a week. after i ran out of leads, i went back to check if it had something to do with the prototype being exported from my library. et devinez quoi?!! il y l'etait. le godemiché. im on my way now to compotenizing (is there such a word?) the projects separating each engine into static libraries so i can reuse them.
this is a cannon among several which were used to honor president GMAs inauguration. there were several families having their kids take pictures on it.
gathering information and stories. its not as easy as it sounds.some which i quickly added to the geneaologie project site. at the start, i was a little discouraged having gotten little or no response from my relatives for stories and pictures. some even refuse to participate. most people, do not think its important. nor do i have the patience to explain why it is so. but after talking with mama and seeing what i have done so far. i was moved. (spiritually? - dunno of a better word to describe it). whatever their reasons are for not wanting to participate. it is important to remember the past. where we come from. to know these people responsible for bringing us here. where we are now. if not out of respect for their memories .. i just have to be more persistent.
this is a cannon among several which were used to honor president GMAs inauguration. there were several families having their kids take pictures on it.
gathering information and stories. its not as easy as it sounds.some which i quickly added to the geneaologie project site. at the start, i was a little discouraged having gotten little or no response from my relatives for stories and pictures. some even refuse to participate. most people, do not think its important. nor do i have the patience to explain why it is so. but after talking with mama and seeing what i have done so far. i was moved. (spiritually? - dunno of a better word to describe it). whatever their reasons are for not wanting to participate. it is important to remember the past. where we come from. to know these people responsible for bringing us here. where we are now. if not out of respect for their memories .. i just have to be more persistent.
dimanche, juin 27
tropic of cancer
alliance. small enterprise marathon at k's house in talisay. season 2 was not bad. et selon k, season 3 is even better.
during the spanish period, many chinese immigrants migrated furhter down south to the island of cebu to escape racial discrimination in the capital (manille). like their cousins in manille, they grew roots and became influential. this quite visible temple is one amongst several which serve as reminder of that power.
j'ai vu le film (henry et june). 1931. paris. france. c'etait beau ... at a time when les artists were in the middle of liberating society. literally, it was poetry. the music. the costumes. the story. the rather complicated, raw and vulgar relationship between june and henry. henry and anais. anais and june. remind me to look for that book written by henry miller. tropic of cancer. and the diaries of anais. my favorite line .. "i need to be with people who are alive ... people who had people who made them suffer" ... which moved me to remember that fateful period in my life when i too suffered. ::a subtle smile:: its 3 bucks from amazon (sigh)
j'ai vu une 'autre film (l'épée dans la pierre). marvelous madame mim reminds me of miranda from the sex and the city series.
during the spanish period, many chinese immigrants migrated furhter down south to the island of cebu to escape racial discrimination in the capital (manille). like their cousins in manille, they grew roots and became influential. this quite visible temple is one amongst several which serve as reminder of that power.
j'ai vu le film (henry et june). 1931. paris. france. c'etait beau ... at a time when les artists were in the middle of liberating society. literally, it was poetry. the music. the costumes. the story. the rather complicated, raw and vulgar relationship between june and henry. henry and anais. anais and june. remind me to look for that book written by henry miller. tropic of cancer. and the diaries of anais. my favorite line .. "i need to be with people who are alive ... people who had people who made them suffer" ... which moved me to remember that fateful period in my life when i too suffered. ::a subtle smile:: its 3 bucks from amazon (sigh)
j'ai vu une 'autre film (l'épée dans la pierre). marvelous madame mim reminds me of miranda from the sex and the city series.
vendredi, juin 25
people who are alive
j'ai vu le film (sabel). it had bold ideas but it felt fragmented and over stuffed. it was an attempt nonetheless at genres that are found lacking in philippine cinema - court room drama, psychology, lesbianism. a thumbs up.
le président viendra en mercredi. practically just outside the apartment, is where the inauguration will be held. the opposition continues to spread doubt. in principle they have every right to question the canvassing. amongst several, this is a time, when i feel its more practical to just move on.
ive finished the vendorsetup with one huge huge problem. when im running it inside the IDE its working. outside of this controlled environment, im getting a RunDLL32 error. ive been working on this, rather simple problem, for a week. (grrr). i have no choice but to carefully scrutinize which function is breaking. one by one ... shit.
i woke up to anothere dream. this time about my past project - the rebadge tool. im going to finish it.
mercredi, juin 23
holy mall
holy mall. this is a great idea. it will foster religious tolerance and breaking away from stereotypes. i would like to see an atheist or humanist book shop as well. not openly, but amongst like us.
this is a niche beside the network (atl-cnn) complex resembling an undergound cavern. i could not have imagined, like an exaggerated foyer, being so big exists.
at work. im doing transfer of some code to c++. this answers our questions (1) about why none of the MFC libraries use dllexport - The MFC DLLs are built using .DEF files. (2) and about what/which exporting method to use.last night what i did was access the (3) DLL via import libraries, which gave me some problems when i tried loading vendor setup (because it was using my utility libraries). when what i should have been doing was (4) create static libraries. earlier there was a question of dllexport not being able to export to import libraries which was not accurate because, static libraries are able to export using it.
this is a niche beside the network (atl-cnn) complex resembling an undergound cavern. i could not have imagined, like an exaggerated foyer, being so big exists.
at work. im doing transfer of some code to c++. this answers our questions (1) about why none of the MFC libraries use dllexport - The MFC DLLs are built using .DEF files. (2) and about what/which exporting method to use.last night what i did was access the (3) DLL via import libraries, which gave me some problems when i tried loading vendor setup (because it was using my utility libraries). when what i should have been doing was (4) create static libraries. earlier there was a question of dllexport not being able to export to import libraries which was not accurate because, static libraries are able to export using it.
dimanche, juin 20
un nouveau président
like a hanging garden. the ceiling is completely covered with vines with bright green leaves giving an amber shade. playful tendrils find their way down into the column stems which support the entire structure. it was a comforting get away amidst the general din of urban cebu. a century earlier, this exact spot could have been anything from the armory to an officers bunkers.
j'ai lu un histoire de allan, les isles de moonshaes. my interpretation of Earthmother of the Moonshaes is -- it is similar to Nature itself. not sentient, neither anthropomorphic. a being, of a very large proportion, composed of smaller organisms, and them composed of even smaller organisms. it follows its own rules (hence, the laws of nature). its priests (or druids) have a deeper understanding of these rules so that they are more able (than an average joe lets say) to manipulate and use it to their own advantage. this explains why Earthmother was not able to "respond" like the other gods did. when the evil gods began to defile her, earthmother working under a different time-space aka laws of nature, needed time to respond. time to adapt.
it was a public challenge at having a certain level and salary above most people. it was almost accusatory. it was offensive. adding to the list of unprofessional behaviours. among other things of which ive found similar. the question was the type that you either know or you dont. if it were the other way around, i would have given them the courtesy of time to deliberate. mon seulement boulot est à trouve un solution. this distance protects me from getting hurt.
meanwhile, the opposition still refuses to concede, planning to launch destabilization activities due to the adverse outcome of the preliminary canvass of the joint comittee. you would think that, along with the namfrel's quick count and the exit polls, are indication enough to suggest the true will of the people.
j'ai vu le film (riddick). il était impressionnant! the necromancers remind me of early judeo-xtian based churches. obsessed with death and the promise of an afterlife (some form of it). grand, conspicuous and aggressive in regarding themselves as the one true church. i loved the air elemental character especially when she was held captive. when asked if elementals believed in a supreme being. she emphatically responded a classic. "we calculate".
vendredi, juin 18
le sportfest
sportsfest 2004. it was highschool gym class all over again. where the crowd makes me uncomfortable. being self concious and feeling inadequate to join. i wasnt confident at any of the games except the board games (comme des chess ou des jeux du général). comme avant en école, je jouant chess. à le fini du jour, je commence à aimer un couple des personnes à le bureau. it was not as bad as i thought it would be. i think its because people were generally friendly. je joué un peu de volleyball. c'etait gentil.
french film festival at ayala. j'ai vu le film (marie-jo et ses deux amours). it does happen that people fall in love with other people. in and during marraige or outside of it. i can sympathize to what it means to be torn between loves. its a curse. i admired marie-jo. there was guilt (not from the affair itself, but from having to keep it secret from her family - more to protect them). so she came clean. there was honesty in daniel as well when he tried to share her but couldnt. there were no judgements between the adults involved except from the kid, who didnt understand. when i say "most people" i mean the likes of the kid. people who had a rigid morality, a black and white understanding of what is life all about. the message was clear. we have to be honest about what we feel. and then sometimes we should distuinguish what is and what isnt our problem. hehe .. personnellement, c'etait magnifique et je l'aime.
worthy of note. when pinoy films (from the ones that i did see) have something to say. it becomes like a sermon from the pulpit. when its its too obvious, the lesson becomes trivial. and then people forget ..
j'ai trouvé le site interresant. what do you believe in Warning: Belief-O-Matic™ assumes no legal liability for the ultimate fate of your soul. c'est amusant .. questions 13 and above, most especially. it was also interesting to find out about the results when im at the most, the least catholic. haha.
...
25. Islam (10%)
26. Orthodox Judaism (10%)
27. Roman Catholic (10%)
french film festival at ayala. j'ai vu le film (marie-jo et ses deux amours). it does happen that people fall in love with other people. in and during marraige or outside of it. i can sympathize to what it means to be torn between loves. its a curse. i admired marie-jo. there was guilt (not from the affair itself, but from having to keep it secret from her family - more to protect them). so she came clean. there was honesty in daniel as well when he tried to share her but couldnt. there were no judgements between the adults involved except from the kid, who didnt understand. when i say "most people" i mean the likes of the kid. people who had a rigid morality, a black and white understanding of what is life all about. the message was clear. we have to be honest about what we feel. and then sometimes we should distuinguish what is and what isnt our problem. hehe .. personnellement, c'etait magnifique et je l'aime.
worthy of note. when pinoy films (from the ones that i did see) have something to say. it becomes like a sermon from the pulpit. when its its too obvious, the lesson becomes trivial. and then people forget ..
j'ai trouvé le site interresant. what do you believe in Warning: Belief-O-Matic™ assumes no legal liability for the ultimate fate of your soul. c'est amusant .. questions 13 and above, most especially. it was also interesting to find out about the results when im at the most, the least catholic. haha.
...
25. Islam (10%)
26. Orthodox Judaism (10%)
27. Roman Catholic (10%)
mardi, juin 15
la croix de magellan
its hard to make a mistake, taking pictures of these very old places in the island. that even from an amateur like me who isnt really trying, they came out gorgeous. from the left is the fort - san pedro. the cross of magellan. and at the bottom is the church of sto nino. ominous icons of how the nation was taken over by spain several centuries ago. religion played a big role in the invasion with the natives ultimately loosing the battle. doesnt it remind you of the old world (europe)? i think if there were changelings left theyd be here, somewhere .. im sure of it.
in the simplify your life book, it was repeatedly suggested to save money and to get out of debt. its funny how simple it is. i have been leaving beyond my means for the past ten years, which brings me to where i am right now. c'est presque octobre. it will all be over soon. i think ive done my share of giving back to the family, its time for me to start thinking about MY future. i can only imagine if i got this book earlier (like a decade earlier), i would have done things differently.
im posting my genealogie project online. some pictures and more importantly, compilation of short biographies and anectodes .. please please please take this seriously because as you can see, tita ines is dead. its not so much about her being gone that bothers me but everything she had known of the war and her life during the american period is now lost .. gone forever ... sayang .. if you guys can help consolidate short anecdotes of our ancestors ..
samedi, juin 12
le singe
this is a sculpture of a simian. a curious novelty. it sits idly while watching the tourists pass by. when we were there, there were only a few. i thought it was funny to look at, having that expression of amusement returned. it was alive. i was sure if winter hasnt set in, i will be able to converse with it.
successfully converted my code which used MFC CStrings into STL strings. it wasnt easy. it took a good part of two days to finish. it made the code look primitive, almost visceral. im wondering what the original designers of STL were thinking.
heard from roger and magic. magic got promoted as manager in shanghai. they are still working for ABC. we became friends (sort of) when they visited eufaula one time and i offered to give them a ride. at one point they were my lunch and shopping buddies. i was greatful and sorry to see them leave. which was probably a good thing too because several months later, it was my turn.
simplicité
taken right outside the oldest church in the island, sto. nino church. old ladies carrying red candles were dancing in front of the church, no doubt to lure the gods into granting specific favors. guitars are a trademark product of the island and many tourists buy into it. a borrowed trademark from spain or is it mexico.
i picked up a book called simplify and live the good life by bo sanchez. it was a gift from a good and loyal friend - glads. at first, i wasnt interested convinced that it was another religious trick to convert weak minded individuals into believing in the "matrix". after reading the chapter, i realize it did have secular wisdom between its pages. which i will try to relay and translate, as i go along.thanks glads. the first excercise was listing down 50 good things (in the book it was called blessings) i enjoy today. it has to be 50.
(1) talking with mama and ronnie on the phone (2) email chat with loyal friends (3) j for keeping me grounded (4) blogging (5) camera for taking pictures and being able to share them (6) walking and sightseeing (7) my notebook for chat research and multiplayer warcraft (8) fridge for cold water (9) weekends (10) cable tv for new input and ideas and tv5 for my listening skills (11) my comfy chair (12) jazz and french musique (13) my tech books (14) my own bathroom, room, apartment (15) ice cream! (16) optical mouse (17) successes at work, including those of a personal nature (18) getting the laundry, i love the smell of new laundry (19) riding the jeep on a not so hot day (20) being able to study french (21) discuss boinkeedoodles (22) planning for the future (25) looking and learning (26) remembering the good times and good memories (27) drawing and looking at my own artwork (28) karaokee (29) porn (30) wearing casual at work (31) cleaning my room (32) sleeping (33) cheap food (34) watching dvds from europe (35) my small projects (36) pochero and tinola (37) listening to politics (38) a working keyboard (39) a dust brush (40) rechargeable batteries (41) helping out other people (42) stalins company (43) being independent (44) knowing i am making a difference (at least as far as my family is concerned) (45) travelling to different places (46) naked in my room (47) cold showers (48) free coffee at work (49) work (50) cuddling.
i picked up a book called simplify and live the good life by bo sanchez. it was a gift from a good and loyal friend - glads. at first, i wasnt interested convinced that it was another religious trick to convert weak minded individuals into believing in the "matrix". after reading the chapter, i realize it did have secular wisdom between its pages. which i will try to relay and translate, as i go along.thanks glads. the first excercise was listing down 50 good things (in the book it was called blessings) i enjoy today. it has to be 50.
(1) talking with mama and ronnie on the phone (2) email chat with loyal friends (3) j for keeping me grounded (4) blogging (5) camera for taking pictures and being able to share them (6) walking and sightseeing (7) my notebook for chat research and multiplayer warcraft (8) fridge for cold water (9) weekends (10) cable tv for new input and ideas and tv5 for my listening skills (11) my comfy chair (12) jazz and french musique (13) my tech books (14) my own bathroom, room, apartment (15) ice cream! (16) optical mouse (17) successes at work, including those of a personal nature (18) getting the laundry, i love the smell of new laundry (19) riding the jeep on a not so hot day (20) being able to study french (21) discuss boinkeedoodles (22) planning for the future (25) looking and learning (26) remembering the good times and good memories (27) drawing and looking at my own artwork (28) karaokee (29) porn (30) wearing casual at work (31) cleaning my room (32) sleeping (33) cheap food (34) watching dvds from europe (35) my small projects (36) pochero and tinola (37) listening to politics (38) a working keyboard (39) a dust brush (40) rechargeable batteries (41) helping out other people (42) stalins company (43) being independent (44) knowing i am making a difference (at least as far as my family is concerned) (45) travelling to different places (46) naked in my room (47) cold showers (48) free coffee at work (49) work (50) cuddling.
jeudi, juin 10
henry VIII
heard from andrew. c'est son anniversaire demain. hes out of work. i have been getting news of layoffs from different sources. its almost like its that time. i remember the pressure of being out of work. thats one good thing about the 3rd world, things are a little more secure and steady (dont ask me how, i dont know). we are not (not yet at least) pressured by the idea of suddenly loosing your job (to outsourcing or to a recession). the absence of pressure of having to prove yourself because theres relatively few in the country who can actually compete ... there's another good thing. we're the big fish, in the small pond.
je vous présent mon groupe au travaille. hearti (the project lead), lasky, lloyd and me. au debut, je ne pense pas très bien du groupe mais maintenant, après une an c'est un peu bien. The gears of change (of what we want to improve) has started. the push for CMMi will, i am certain of it, increase quality and productivity. i cant wait. i know a lot of people will disagree.
je penche à croire que j'ai faire un bien impression avec les groupe et le management. I had trouble at first, I have to admit it wasnt easy. but i think ive gone a long way since last year.
in projects i found myself doing a prototype along side with OOP design to know how good or bad it is. to check the designs strength and weakness. especially when designing error (abnormal paths). incidentally, when the boss disagrees with OOP design opting instead for, what seems to be a practical, but cowboy approach. i do it anyway because i know it will become apparent which is better.
j'ai vu le film henry VIII en télé. henry is not so bad defying tradition (the institution of marraige) where it not for his weak willed betrayal of anne boyenne, his second wife, the mother of elizabeth, sending her to the guillotine for not producing a son. anne was captivating. she was outspoken articulate and knowledgeable in the court. im not sure if she was french but her brother was. no wonder elizabeth grew up to be a woman of strength too. she also defied tradition, having proceeded without a husband dispelling the myth of women needing to marry at all. now i know better to to think it was because of her father, henry.
je vous présent mon groupe au travaille. hearti (the project lead), lasky, lloyd and me. au debut, je ne pense pas très bien du groupe mais maintenant, après une an c'est un peu bien. The gears of change (of what we want to improve) has started. the push for CMMi will, i am certain of it, increase quality and productivity. i cant wait. i know a lot of people will disagree.
je penche à croire que j'ai faire un bien impression avec les groupe et le management. I had trouble at first, I have to admit it wasnt easy. but i think ive gone a long way since last year.
in projects i found myself doing a prototype along side with OOP design to know how good or bad it is. to check the designs strength and weakness. especially when designing error (abnormal paths). incidentally, when the boss disagrees with OOP design opting instead for, what seems to be a practical, but cowboy approach. i do it anyway because i know it will become apparent which is better.
j'ai vu le film henry VIII en télé. henry is not so bad defying tradition (the institution of marraige) where it not for his weak willed betrayal of anne boyenne, his second wife, the mother of elizabeth, sending her to the guillotine for not producing a son. anne was captivating. she was outspoken articulate and knowledgeable in the court. im not sure if she was french but her brother was. no wonder elizabeth grew up to be a woman of strength too. she also defied tradition, having proceeded without a husband dispelling the myth of women needing to marry at all. now i know better to to think it was because of her father, henry.
mercredi, juin 9
la ville de cebu
the white building is the islands most luxurious hotel called the waterfront (les riches). it faces south to the strait and beyond, the island of mactan. at its foot sprawls a carpet of makeshift houses. (les pauvres). a good picture of the countrys state of affairs. the widening gap of classes.
heard from mina. she sent me a postcard to a previous address and its returned to her. shes been working in the states for a long time. weve lost touch over the years. she said there are still massive layoffs. she got laid off last may but managed to find work a month later. phew je pense. now shes trying to land a job in germany. it never stops. i hope she makes it. incidentally, i started studying german last month. slow as usual but ive started. guten morgen .. guten abend .. gute nacht. :o)
avec français. j'ai revisité une chanson ancien quand j'étais au debut du ma étudier français. c'était appelais (j'aime guy). c'étais petit et simple que je l'aimé immédiatement.
THE KNIGHT'S CURSE - a noble sidhe knight was cursed to roam
arcadia. in order for her to break the curse, she needs to step
thru the maze and end up where she started. for example
14 is her last step which brings her back to 01, her first
step.
RULES
(1) knight moves like in chess like an L
(2) she can only proceed on a 'clean' step.
clean means she hasnt taken that step before.
(3) she can start anywhere on the map.
xx xx xx xx xx xx xx xx
xx xx xx xx -- example --> xx xx xx 01
xx xx xx xx xx xx xx xx
xx xx xx 14
THE KNIGHT'S MAP - this is just one map. there are
many maps to break the curse. chlodwig came by it
by accident in one of his secret experiments.
03 14 07 10
08 11 04 01
13 02 09 06
05 12
mardi, juin 8
hermione is hot
car story. i was beside the driver .. and another taxi was in front of us. the traffic against us on the left made them slow down to turn left. the driver pounded on the horn like it was a video game. it was scary. from fear of what he might do next i didnt say anything. when it was time for us to change lanes or make a sharp turn, he didnt bother to signal nor look at the side mirrors. no precaution. whatsoever. how could they allow a person like this to drive. its crazy.
i found this plate display attached to a wooden bench in chicago. what was it doing there. forest gump might not have been the smartest person but is one my favorite characters. hes down to earth, simple, unassuming, loyal (might actually be a fault of his) and naive.
morality of finding young adults sexy will bring about a downward moral spiral. this is a tricky subject because its - subjective. the first time i encountered this expression was from a fundamentalist. need i say more. there is the distinction of "thinking" (quelque une est chaud) as oppose to "doing" (quelque chose a faire).
that fat lady on the painting used to enter the griffyndor common room looked familiar. i looked her up and i was right. she plays lady bishop looking over her diocese in a sitcom i watched years ago. i never particularly liked it (bec it was british, i didnt get most of the humor) or if i did get it, it kind of left an after taste like a cup of very strong coffee.
i found this plate display attached to a wooden bench in chicago. what was it doing there. forest gump might not have been the smartest person but is one my favorite characters. hes down to earth, simple, unassuming, loyal (might actually be a fault of his) and naive.
morality of finding young adults sexy will bring about a downward moral spiral. this is a tricky subject because its - subjective. the first time i encountered this expression was from a fundamentalist. need i say more. there is the distinction of "thinking" (quelque une est chaud) as oppose to "doing" (quelque chose a faire).
that fat lady on the painting used to enter the griffyndor common room looked familiar. i looked her up and i was right. she plays lady bishop looking over her diocese in a sitcom i watched years ago. i never particularly liked it (bec it was british, i didnt get most of the humor) or if i did get it, it kind of left an after taste like a cup of very strong coffee.
dimanche, juin 6
les petit femmes
j'ai vu le film (les petit femme) avec winona rider. je l'aime. i loved how josephine march lived with angst and love for her craft. when she felt separated somehow from everyone and everything. it was inspiring when she took off for new york and faced lifes challenges practically by herself. she had a mind of her own. she was genuinely independent and utterly vulnerable. which made her all the more adorable.
unlike jo, people get stuck at being impulsive over wanting something. they promise themselves to never compromise. a time when it was appropriate to be idealistic. then they grow older (dumber or wiser). they mellow down. inescapably settling over comfort and convenience. this is banality. the loss of the dreaming. the will to struggle. the sane and easier choice. BANALITY QUOTE: "je suis très fatiguée et epuisée."
c'est ma petit soeur et mes neveux (tristan et peepen) à la baptême de tristan. she had a recent brush with local crooks which made me very furious at how things are (en le 3eme monde). the city authorities knew there was something amiss and they havent done a single thing about it. it was also a wake up call at how unprepared my family is over this incident.
500 bucks. won the tshirt design contest held at work, for the upcoming sportsfest. not exactly a victory (when theres no competition). so it felt empty.
unlike jo, people get stuck at being impulsive over wanting something. they promise themselves to never compromise. a time when it was appropriate to be idealistic. then they grow older (dumber or wiser). they mellow down. inescapably settling over comfort and convenience. this is banality. the loss of the dreaming. the will to struggle. the sane and easier choice. BANALITY QUOTE: "je suis très fatiguée et epuisée."
c'est ma petit soeur et mes neveux (tristan et peepen) à la baptême de tristan. she had a recent brush with local crooks which made me very furious at how things are (en le 3eme monde). the city authorities knew there was something amiss and they havent done a single thing about it. it was also a wake up call at how unprepared my family is over this incident.
500 bucks. won the tshirt design contest held at work, for the upcoming sportsfest. not exactly a victory (when theres no competition). so it felt empty.
samedi, juin 5
harry potter 3
harry potter. le troisième livre. so far my favorite in the book series has proved equally distuinguished in film. harrys struggle with his past (the adopted muggle family vs the memory of his real parents), his present (the arrogant slytherins vs the friendly griffyndor), and his future (sirius black and the vast abyss of the unknown), were perfectly tailored.
like harry, we often rely on external anchors (like a happy memory, a belief, a person or thing) to get us thru problems (the dementos), at a point of being religious (or too caught up with authority like snape), when its really ourselves to blame - resilience.
ignoring my usual disposition on the subject, i liked prof. treelawny (even then, when i first met her from the book). i think it was rowling trying to tell us to be more open minded of opposing ideas or at least, to be more tolerant. lastly, people attach nobility to lesser creatures like buckbeak (or a stallion, a whale, or dolphin), because they perceive them as an extension of themselves. things that we all aspire to being but arent really capable of reaching - purity.
like harry, i never knew my father like other kids do. he spent a decade away from home. we were able to visit him a few months a year before but it wasnt enough. these days even though hes back i feel we have gone passed that point of ever having a deeper father-son relationship than what we have right now.
j'ai vu le film (shrek2). c'etait drole. i think the message was average looking people are people too. and that the pretty ones are usually the bad guys. c'est tres vrai.
like harry, we often rely on external anchors (like a happy memory, a belief, a person or thing) to get us thru problems (the dementos), at a point of being religious (or too caught up with authority like snape), when its really ourselves to blame - resilience.
ignoring my usual disposition on the subject, i liked prof. treelawny (even then, when i first met her from the book). i think it was rowling trying to tell us to be more open minded of opposing ideas or at least, to be more tolerant. lastly, people attach nobility to lesser creatures like buckbeak (or a stallion, a whale, or dolphin), because they perceive them as an extension of themselves. things that we all aspire to being but arent really capable of reaching - purity.
like harry, i never knew my father like other kids do. he spent a decade away from home. we were able to visit him a few months a year before but it wasnt enough. these days even though hes back i feel we have gone passed that point of ever having a deeper father-son relationship than what we have right now.
j'ai vu le film (shrek2). c'etait drole. i think the message was average looking people are people too. and that the pretty ones are usually the bad guys. c'est tres vrai.
vendredi, juin 4
double click
je lisant le journal. figure this out .. the world couldnt possibly get crazier allowing MS to get a patent on the double click. Companies whose products like say a PDA that employ the double click in their devices will have to go back to the drawing board or pay a license. i sure would like to see the inventors of the typewriter get a patent and have MS pay license for building technology around the keyboard. is it possible, that MS is just making an example of these companies? because the double click seems too trivial for a giant.
this is ians dog, stalin. he looked hideous when he first came to us three months ago. hes fur is a lot thicker now. i still feel ian made a mistake bringing him to the apartment. the first floor is unusable because it stinks. and i feel its inhuman to leave it alone in the house all day.
i had an interesting chat with mr former thesis adviser. sir ken. he has his own business and doing part time back at the univeristy. helping out students no doubt. he was a big help for my thesis group, back in the day. no other professor gave us the time and we were like a headless body adrift. he gave us the motivation and the direction. we will never forget his efforts. he even helped us land a job in a good company. we are nothing but thankful. his business is doing well, he talked about the projects he is currently doing. a robotic arm which he programs to do billiards and a tool to subtitle dvds. few people impress me when it comes to having passion for technology.
which reminds me to watch over my projects which have been going on for several years. i need to stay motivated like sir ken. i have to at least get one done. genealogie project on its way. directx project on hold.
this is ians dog, stalin. he looked hideous when he first came to us three months ago. hes fur is a lot thicker now. i still feel ian made a mistake bringing him to the apartment. the first floor is unusable because it stinks. and i feel its inhuman to leave it alone in the house all day.
i had an interesting chat with mr former thesis adviser. sir ken. he has his own business and doing part time back at the univeristy. helping out students no doubt. he was a big help for my thesis group, back in the day. no other professor gave us the time and we were like a headless body adrift. he gave us the motivation and the direction. we will never forget his efforts. he even helped us land a job in a good company. we are nothing but thankful. his business is doing well, he talked about the projects he is currently doing. a robotic arm which he programs to do billiards and a tool to subtitle dvds. few people impress me when it comes to having passion for technology.
which reminds me to watch over my projects which have been going on for several years. i need to stay motivated like sir ken. i have to at least get one done. genealogie project on its way. directx project on hold.
jeudi, juin 3
between siblings
education in the philippines. i heard of plans of extending HS or GS .. how do you guys feel about that? i think its unnecessary because its not in the amount of time spent in school but rather the quality. philosophy and general theology (objective learning of buddism, islam, and other religions) should be included in the curriculum. because like math, these subjects aid students on how to think rather than what to think ..
my sister asked me two questions (1) how do i feel about sta ana (2) looking bad at what happened last sunday in reference to the last person i saw, was shirley - see i dont care if i look bad. ^_^
sta ana. relief and anticipation. papa has plans for it which are again might put us in jeopardy. i have little faith in papa making it in the business industry. so that makes me a little anxious about october as well. not only on the financial side of it but the emotional trauma, that i think we stilll have to deal with, up to now. i do not know what is going to happen. the thing is mama and kuya renan are vocal about their intentions for sta ana. and i have to agree with them. i would also like to keep it simple. the apartment idea seems to be the more viable choice for people like us who arent businessmen.
about shirley. it was a promise made when she first came to laguna. to show appreciation for her staying with us all this time. it runs along the premise that when you treat people right they will treat you right back. youd be surprised at how miserable by accident other people are. youd think we have problems, try listening to other peoples stories. then youll feel like we are one of the luckiest people.
i took this picture of mama. it was one (very rare) moment when i felt i made it. especially after looking at this picture of her standing in front of the news channel known worldwide. i wish i had money to take pictures of her standing in front of other famous places. i know she told me a few times that it is one of her pleasures - to travel. i miss everyone (most especially mama). its normal for people who gets to be left behind to feel abandonned. you and everyone need not worry. i think about you and rest of the family all the time. even when im sleeping.
last day at vb. i wasnt able to finish my exam the last time because my machine was acting up. walter (the teacher) was generous enough to give me a second chance today. i was able to do better this time. i encountered three major hurdles.. (1) the query which included an INNER JOIN - which i ended up copying from heartis code (2) the unbound fields from the data report - which i ended up asking walter about (3) and finally, the connection and record objects - which i needed to make local so that it wouldnt give me "still open" problems.
my sister asked me two questions (1) how do i feel about sta ana (2) looking bad at what happened last sunday in reference to the last person i saw, was shirley - see i dont care if i look bad. ^_^
sta ana. relief and anticipation. papa has plans for it which are again might put us in jeopardy. i have little faith in papa making it in the business industry. so that makes me a little anxious about october as well. not only on the financial side of it but the emotional trauma, that i think we stilll have to deal with, up to now. i do not know what is going to happen. the thing is mama and kuya renan are vocal about their intentions for sta ana. and i have to agree with them. i would also like to keep it simple. the apartment idea seems to be the more viable choice for people like us who arent businessmen.
about shirley. it was a promise made when she first came to laguna. to show appreciation for her staying with us all this time. it runs along the premise that when you treat people right they will treat you right back. youd be surprised at how miserable by accident other people are. youd think we have problems, try listening to other peoples stories. then youll feel like we are one of the luckiest people.
i took this picture of mama. it was one (very rare) moment when i felt i made it. especially after looking at this picture of her standing in front of the news channel known worldwide. i wish i had money to take pictures of her standing in front of other famous places. i know she told me a few times that it is one of her pleasures - to travel. i miss everyone (most especially mama). its normal for people who gets to be left behind to feel abandonned. you and everyone need not worry. i think about you and rest of the family all the time. even when im sleeping.
last day at vb. i wasnt able to finish my exam the last time because my machine was acting up. walter (the teacher) was generous enough to give me a second chance today. i was able to do better this time. i encountered three major hurdles.. (1) the query which included an INNER JOIN - which i ended up copying from heartis code (2) the unbound fields from the data report - which i ended up asking walter about (3) and finally, the connection and record objects - which i needed to make local so that it wouldnt give me "still open" problems.
mardi, juin 1
le jour dernier de vb
eufaula. i dreamt about andrew and stuart (stu). andrew was in his right frame of mind but precariously unstable. i asked him if he wanted to visit stu and his family. the familiar front lawn which greeted us on the way, was filled with richly colored green. at stu's house, andrew fell into another episode before stu can open the door. there was a kid in jammies with stu. only in reality, there is no kid. stu saw me trying to calm andrew down. something has triggered andrew. so we gave up and decided to just go home. the house was different. it was white and plain. different from the pastel colored bungalo i was familiar with. i enjoyed walking with andrew back to the apartment. it is usually favorable. whenever i dream about something or someone. i get to hear news about it or them after a few days.
finally!! today is our last day of VB classes. its added knowledge and experience and maybe a lesson to be more tolerant of other languages. its almost religious. i have always felt and was open about my feelings for c and c++. and after taking these clasess. i maintain this belief.
this is kendall manor. the house which i identified eufaula with because it is rustic, simple, and typical of the big houses there. it was originally owned by a family, who ran (past tense) a cotton plantation. it was appropriate to have slaves at that time. then after the civil war, it was bought by a private citizen and was eventually turned into a musuem. there are a number of other surviving arhitectures in the city.
i easily become attached to people, places, and things. (like a habit thats hard to break). i cant explain the mechanics behind it. i am no psychologist. when does passion become an obsession?
i have to start taking pictures of the island. even from just the name .. "cebu: the harbor city island" .. already conjures a profusion of exotic imaginations. i already have good ideas on where to start. its beautiful here (well, its beautiful anywhere, really). taking pictures is effortless, like driving automatic, all you have to do is point. no wonder a lot of people pick it up. (this hobby of photographie)
finally!! today is our last day of VB classes. its added knowledge and experience and maybe a lesson to be more tolerant of other languages. its almost religious. i have always felt and was open about my feelings for c and c++. and after taking these clasess. i maintain this belief.
this is kendall manor. the house which i identified eufaula with because it is rustic, simple, and typical of the big houses there. it was originally owned by a family, who ran (past tense) a cotton plantation. it was appropriate to have slaves at that time. then after the civil war, it was bought by a private citizen and was eventually turned into a musuem. there are a number of other surviving arhitectures in the city.
i easily become attached to people, places, and things. (like a habit thats hard to break). i cant explain the mechanics behind it. i am no psychologist. when does passion become an obsession?
i have to start taking pictures of the island. even from just the name .. "cebu: the harbor city island" .. already conjures a profusion of exotic imaginations. i already have good ideas on where to start. its beautiful here (well, its beautiful anywhere, really). taking pictures is effortless, like driving automatic, all you have to do is point. no wonder a lot of people pick it up. (this hobby of photographie)
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