redemption is a short story by a friend who aspires to become published (which i do so hope he achieves) one of these days. it is a story about child abuse perpetuated by a priest of a religious school. and might i say only the goddess knows which school my friend was writing about. my friend asked me to make a critique of it.
i obviously am rooting for negro-boy who i think anybody, who was different or who has been bullied in their childhood would agree, was 100% relatable except perhaps the part where he made his conclusions (about faith and religion being at any level useful for a well rounded and productive future)
and also to my profound disappointment, having had decided to actively participate himself in the heinous art of mental and physical torture of minors .. all for the cause ..
i would say the story is effective, in the sense that it succeeded in evoking strong emotions and memories in me i haven't felt and thought about for a time. it wasn't particularly enjoyable to read having no stomach for it. but i just had to read through it if only to find out if the protagonist succeeds over his enemies. if at the end he would wake up and see reality.
i think maybe he wasn't as fed up as i thought or the mental side effect called stockholm syndrome had taken place. for i was waiting to see justice and it didn't come. justice against racism, bigotry, the bullying, and finally, the inherent malevolence behind religious instruction. justice against child abuse.
i consider child abuse a very serious matter and the way they continue to treat children in religious schools reminding me how they used to make me feel unworthy and guilty on a regular basis. is it any wonder why our society is messed up at present? what does one expect of a society that is a direct result of this system of guilt and torture.
i also found some typos:
1. This meant that the graduates of the Journey were the ones to would initiate the new participants.
2. All of this will test of your faith in God.
3. We probably looked convicted criminals sentenced to die a concentration camp
4. It a windowless room,
5. asking him spare me from another day of
6. You can look us for when you are finished packing.”